So I'm not sure what the school assignment was, or whether I actually followed the prompt or put my own "creative spin" on things, as I often tended to do, but I recently found a story lying around that I wrote in high school, circa probably 2001 or so. It's bound together with yellow ribbon, and the letters on the outside are falling off, but it once read "HIPPO AND RHINO" and is a pure gem of a read for anyone who likes truly awful animal fiction.
Since that's pretty much everyone with a brain, I am re-writing it here for you now. I will not change any language, sentence structure, or spelling as to respect the integrity of 15 year old Cammie the author. I also included photos in my original publication, straight from clip art and glued onto sheets of paper. To give you the full effect, I have taken pictures with my camera and will be inserting them throughout the story as well.
Enjoy!
BY CAMMIE LINK
There once was a hippo who was bathing in the hot sun. She wanted to get a beautiful tan to impress the rhino who lived down the river from her. So she sat in the sun, her skin slowly getting darker and darker. And her eyes got heavier and heavier, and soon she was asleep. When she awoke, it was evening, and her skin was as red as a ruby. So she waddled home to soak in aloe Vera and drink lemonade. But as she rubbed the lotion on her body and sunk into a bubble bath, there was a knock at the door. Wrapping a huge towel around herself, she went to the door and opened it to find rhino standing there, with a bouquet of roses.
The hippo looked in disbelief at the roses, then at the smiling Rhino. Her nostrils flared up and her eyes narrowed. "How dare you," she grunted. "That is not funny at all."
Rhino was confused. "What do you mean?"
"You knew I was in love with you and that I was getting a tan to impress you and then I got a sunburn so you decided to go get some red roses to make fun of my red skin and then pretend to love me too. Well guess what, Rhino. I'm not falling for it. So you can just take your roses and go home and think about how mean you are."
The Rhino was now completely baffled. "But, Hippo, that wasn't my plan at all. In fact, I didn't even know-" the rest of his words were abruptly stopped by the slam of the door. He grudgingly walked the rest of the wya home, his head down and the flowers drooping.
**turn page**
* * * *
the next morning, Hippo woke up sore and unhappy. She could not believe that Rhino was so insensitive. Rhino had always been the nice one. He had always been there to comfort her when she needed it. But now, in her deepest time of need, he made fun of her? She was furious, and from then on she vowed never to think of Rhino again.
It didn't work. Everything in her house reminded her of Rhino. When she walked into the kitchen, she saw a chocolate cake on the counter, the one she had made for Rhino, just before he had ruined everything. When she walked into the living room, she was faced with her crimson sofa, the same color as Rhino's hateful roses. And when she walked into her bedroom, she confronted the quilt Rhino had brought her when she was near death the month before. Tears stinging her eyes, Hippo wrapped the warm blanket around herself and lay down on the ground, sobbing until she fell asleep.
* * * *
Rhino awoke miserable. He couldn't believe that Hippo thought he was so insensitive. Why would he ever make fun of Hippo, his one true love? He had brought her flowers as a gift, just to show that he was thinking of his dear friend. But, what had he gotten in return? He had gotten a good lecture and a door slammed in his face. Oh, well, rhino signed, sinking deeper into his pillows. I guess she just doesn't love me. I'll just have to give up. At that thought, a little voice interrupted him- the voice of his great grandfather, the wisest rhino ever to walk the earth.
**turn page**
"Yes, great grandfather?" Rhino squeaked, frightened. The wise rhino had never spoken to him before.
"Never give up, Rhino," he commanded. "Hippo loves you, and you must show her that you care about her enough not to take no for an answer. Show her that you love her. Be creative. Be thoughtful. But be kind." And with that, the wise rhino was gone.
Rhino sat on his bed, astounded. That rhino really is wise, he remarked. That was great advice. And with that, he leapt out of bed to try for Hippo's love yet again.
* * * *
A sharp knock awoke Hippo from a horrible dream, once where Rhino had come to see her, only she had turned into a huge tomato, and he just laughed and laughed and laughed.
Hippo stumbled from the ground and waddled to the door, wiping her face dry from her tears and fluffing her hair. She opened the door. There stood Rhino, his arms full of bananas, Hippo's favorite fruit. But, of course, Hippo saw right past the fact that Rhino remembered her favorite food.
"Rhino, what is this?" she cried, her voice loud and piercing. "You come over here with a bunch of bananas! What, are you just showing me what I'll look like once I start peeling? We, and I'm tired of you making fun of my sunburn!! So stop bothering me. In fact, I never want to see you again!" And Rhino was greeted with yet another door slam in his face.
**page turn**
* * * *
Rhino threw the bananas on his kitchen table and groaned. He shook his head in disbelief. How could he have done something like that? He couldn't believe he hadn't made the connection between bananas and peeling. Maybe he really was a cruel and hearless rhinoceros. Maybe he didn't deserve someone as beautiful and as wonderful as Hippo was. Perhaps fate was trying to tell him something. He was just not a loveable guy. With this realization came a deep heartache. He sunk into his comfy chair and stared out into the sky through his window.
He leapt up at the sight he saw. "That's it!" he shouted enthusiastically, throwing his hoof into the air triumphantly. "A note in the sky won't be offensive at all! I'll hire a skywriter to write a message to Hippo in the air, and then she'll know how much I love her and want to be with her!"
He thrust open the door and ran to the nearest skywriter's house.
Hippo sat distractedly at her kitchen table, sipping a cup of tea and staring blankly out the window at the sky. She watched as several birds squawked their way across the horizon, plummeting into a freshwater lake below.
She drew in her breath sharply at the sight that appeared next. There were words written in the sky. She didn't have her glasses on, so she had to squint to read the words.
**page turn**
* * * *
Rhino practically skipped to Hippo's house that afternoon. The skywriting had gone flawlessly, the words scripted perfectly into the pale blue sky. He knew that this time, he had finally done something that would get Hippo to love him. How could it have possibly failed? Rhino asked himself with a smile. "Yes, you are a genius," Rhino commented, turning up the walk to Hippo's door. "You've finally done something right." But when the doorbell rang and no one answered, he began to wonder if Hippo had even seen his message. What if she was at the store while she man was writing? Rhino thought frantically. What if she was taking a bath? Or what if she slipped and fell and she's lying dead inside her house with no one to care for her? Oh, I must go in and rescue her! Rhino tried the handle of the door, and when he found it locked did the only other thing possible- he lowered his head, and butted his tusks sharply into the door, knocking it down in one clean thrust.
**page turn**
He rushed through the doorway, and came face to face with Hippo. "Oh, Hippo, thank God you're-"
"Shut up," Hippo snarled, her eyes flashly wildly, nostrils flaring. "Where exactly do you come up with these cruel and heartless ideas? How can you be so evil?"
Rhino looked at her, his face ashen with grief. "Wha- what do you mean? Didn't you see the note in the sky?"
"Oh yes, the little 'note in the sky.' How sweet you are. I can't believe you, telling everyone about my sunburn." Her face turned from angry to disappointed. "I really thought you were better than that, Rhino. I really did."
"But, but Hippo, I didn't tell anyone about your sunburn," Rhino protested, his eyes pleading with hers. "Please, you must believe me. I would never hurt you."
"Then what do you think you did with that phrase in the air, huh? What, you thought I would be thrilled to read it?" She snorted, shaking her head.
Suddenly Rhino realized what had happened. "Hippo," he asked softly, "what exactly did you read in the sky?"
"Don't play dumb, Rhino, you're the one who made it up."
"Please, Hippo, just tell me what you read," he looked pathetically at her, his eyes softening into a look he knew no Hippo could resist.
"It said, 'Hippo is charring you,'" she replied, her voice full of embarrassment.
Rhino burst out laughing. "Hippo, that's not what it said!" he cried.
"It-it's not?" Hippo looked at Rhino uncertainly.
"No, I would never say something like that," Rhino put his hands on Hippo's shoulders.
**page turn**
"Then, what did it really say?" Hippo looked deeply into his eyes.
"It said 'Hippo, I cherish you'. Yes, Hippo, I really do cherish you." Rhino stared back into her eyes.
She smiled shyly, a small tear falling from her face. "You really do?" She laughed. "You really do."
"Yes, Hippo," he gently brushed the tear from her soft face. "I love you more than any other Rhino could love anyone." And with that, he brought his lips softly to hers .
"I love you too, Rhino," Hippo murmured.
And they lived happily together ever after.
David said this was the true story of his life, as women are honestly just as dramatic and ridiculous and poor Hippo. He is probably right.
Omg I am laughing so much that I can't even leave a clever comment on this.
ReplyDelete